Bad communication isn’t just bad communication. It’s a symptom of something deeper going on in your organisation. And when there’s a problem with your culture, processes, leadership or behaviour, it shows up as Dirty Language.
And this week’s Dirty Language Award goes to…
🏆 The Furness Building Society 🏆
- 2 sides of A4
- 16 paragraphs
- 800 or so words
- No headings
- Confusing sentences
- Passive language
And featuring this gem of a paragraph…
When you are paying a cheque to the Society in respect of initial interest, fees or a mortgage payment, please do not make the cheque out simply to the Furness Building Society. The cheque should either be made payable to yourself (all account holders) including your account number(s) or “Furness Building Society re: (your name(s)/account numbers(s)”. You should also draw a line through unused space on the cheque so unauthorised people cannot add extra numbers or names.
Guess what they wanted the customer to do? A complicated, deeply involved 8-step process? Nope. They just wanted a payment for £12.39.
It might seem like a simple problem to fix, just write a better letter. But remember, those bad letters are just a symptom of what’s going on around your business. So this kind of legalese can’t be tackled with a simple rewrite. It’s about taking your business on a journey. A journey to align your culture, brand, comms and behaviour, so you consistently do the right thing for customers.
Want to know more? Drop me a line and I’ll talk you through the Afia donut, that’s 20 years of experience honed down into one delicious way to align your culture, brand, comms and behaviour.